The most positive take for Eagles fans after Week 7 is that no one in the division beat anyone of substance. Sure, the Giants moved to 4-3, which technically knocks the Birds out of first place. So what? The overall difference between last week and now is the equivalent of that one time you recycled in college; sure, by definition, some change was made, but let’s not act like the course of the world shifted.
The Giants are back in first. Washington, by way of tie-break, is in second. That doesn’t change the reality; if the inconsistent Eagles can find some consistency, they can still take control of this consistently inconsistent division by Thanksgiving.
Oh, and Dallas hasn’t won in five weeks.
New York Giants
What Happened: The Giants got their 4th win of the season (insert joke here about how that’s the same number of fingers JPP has) against a division rival, putting them above .500 and into first place. From a top-level perspective, that’s pretty good.
However, for the 2nd week in a row, the Giants squandered terrible quarterback play from their opponent. Like Bradford the week before, Matt Cassel threw three interceptions, yet Eli and Co. weren’t able to do anything with it. It’s like they’re coming down the stairs Christmas morning, running up to the tree, and lighting it on fire. Coughlin’s team is doing everything in their power to take the gift horse to the glue factory.
NFL
The Cowboys somehow tied this one up late, when former Jerry Jones employee Dwayne Harris returned a kickoff for what would end up being the go-ahead score. It was only due to anti-Jerry-Jones karma that Big Blue escaped with a victory, and any New Yorkers feeling down on this squad a week ago shouldn’t exactly be brimming with confidence today.
What This Means For The Eagles: The Giants are back in first place, which at this point is the equivalent of leading in the NASCAR Sprint series (who really knows what it means?). Considering Big Blue is the only NFC East team the Iggles have looked competent against, this is probably a best case scenario.
Last week, Fletcher Cox and Crew completely manhandled the Giants on national television. The Eagles have since lost to the undefeated Panthers while New York defeated a Romo-less, Dez-less Dallas squad. What’s really changed?
If you felt Chip’s squad was better than the Giants three days ago, you have every right to feel the same way today.
What’s Next: @ New Orleans, @ Tampa Bay, vs. New England. Considering Eli is Bill Belichick’s kryptonite, this is actually a pretty easy few weeks worth of games.
Washington R-Word’s
What happened: For the second time this season, Kirk Cousins marched his team down for a game-winning touchdown drive. Making this week’s comeback even more impressive is that Washington found themselves down 24 -0 at one point. It’s a ridiculous comeback, even if it did come at the expense of the ridiculously-terrible Tampa Bay Bucs.
Don’t tell that to Cousins though. The Washington signal-caller went WWE on the local media after the game, yelling “You like that!” at a reporter that had previously criticized him. I’m sure the reporters in DC will all forget about that the next time Cousins has a two-interception disaster.
After defeating last season’s worst team by the skin of their teeth, Washington is now one win away from their total for 2014. Is that enough to save Jay Gruden’s job? Is it enough for Cousins to get a contract extension? If I’m a fan of the Washington football team (and let me go on the record as saying, I’d rather binge-watch all six seasons of The Nanny than root for this franchise), I’m hoping the answer to both of those questions is an emphatic “nope.”
What This Means For The Eagles: So Washington has the same record as the Eagles, meaning they’re just one game out of leading the division. With Jordan Reed returning strong and DeSean Jackson not far behind, the Skins arrow is arguably trending upwards. Arguable, of course, if you haven’t been paying attention to this franchise for the past twenty years.
Good for Cousins and all, but a last second victory at home against the Lovie Smith Bucs does not change a narrative. Washington is still terrible. The loss to Washington was still terrible. And the fact that the Eagles are seven games into the season and have the same record as Dan Snyder’s club is the kind of terrible that should keep Jeff Lurie up at night.
What’s Next: @ Patriots, vs. Saints, @ Carolina, vs. the Giants. Washington getting a win in November is about as likely as Snyder changing the team name on his own volition.
Dallas Cowboys
What happened: Jerry Jones and the Cowboys made the QB switch from Brandon Weeden to Matt Cassel, the football equivalent of a health fair making the mascot switch of Ronald McDonald to Colonel Sanders. Like Weeden, Cassel had his moments against a questionable Big Blue secondary, but he also had three interceptions (including two to former-Eagle and half-effort-giver Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie), one of which was a pick-six.
Jones had said earlier this week Cassel would take more risks than Weeden. In about 18-minutes of football, Matty Cass threw more interceptions than Weeden had thrown all year, proving the Cowboys owner and GM-for-Life prophetic. Man, this guy really knows football.
Speaking of stupid unnecessary risks that end up blowing up in your face and making you look like a big idiot….
After the Cowboys special teams gave up the go-ahead touchdown, Greg Hardy (whom you may remember is a gun-loving alleged domestic abuser incapable of feeling remorse, who was suspended the first four games of the season because of that alleged domestic abuse, and whose very existence on an NFL roster is an embarrassment to decent society) decided to start pushing and yelling at the team’s special teams coordinator. This is sort of relatable, as I’ve definitely yelled at a few Eagles special teams coordinators (Curse you, Bobby April!), but then again, I’m not on the team’s 53-man roster. Then again, Hardy probably shouldn’t be either.
The end result was FOX cameras catching Dez Bryant and Hardy getting into it on the sidelines, an attempt (presumably) by Dez to calm Hardy down. When Dez Bryant…. seen here previously yelling at everyone…. is the voice of reason, a new extreme has been reached. Like Chris Berman saying your comb-over is noticeable, or Andy Reid stating you’ve had a mustache for too long. The pot’s and kettle’s are getting into it in Dallas, a trend that’s only going to continue as this team keeps losing.
The person with the most egg on his face, though, has to be Jones. The human cartoon, presumably in an attempt to justify spending money on a piece of human garbage like Hardy, continues to defend the players indefensible actions. Even a Kardashian would call this guy enabled, and it’s Jerry Jones who’s doing the enabling. For Eagles fans, the sideshow in Dallas is way more fun to watch than any Bradford-led offense.
What This Means For The Eagles: The Cowboys still haven’t won a game since Romo went down, a trend the Eagles need to make sure continues in Week 9. Bryant, it appears, will be back by then, but with Cassel throwing him the ball, how big a threat can he really be?
Reports indicate Romo will be back before Thanksgiving. If the ‘Boys haven’t won a game before then, Romo probably would be better off waiting till next season to return, no matter how mediocre the Eagles, Giants, and Washington have been playing. The NFC East is like watching slugs race; the majority are moving pretty slow, but there’s at least one heading in the wrong direction.
What’s Next: Two home games; one against a desperate Seattle team, another against a hopefully-desperate Chip Kelly squad. Jones’ powderkeg could be as low as 2-6 before Romo returns, which should be enough to bury them.